- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a featured article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Grievous[]
(5 Inqs/6 Users/11 Total)[]
Support
- Previously featured. Chack Jadson Talk 14:36, 10 August 2007 (UTC)
- Jediknight19bby (Jedi High Council Chambers!) 00:45, 11 August 2007 (UTC)
- Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 15:45, 23 August 2007 (UTC)
- Unit 8311 15:25, 25 August 2007 (UTC)
- Greyman(Paratus) 21:36, 7 September 2007 (UTC)
- Thefourdotelipsis 07:21, 12 September 2007 (UTC)
- --Aabsdu 14:39, 15 September 2007 (UTC)
- Even if he is a droid, it's a good read. Jorrel Fraajic 02:52, 25 September 2007 (UTC)
- A worthy article Hunterj 16:53, 28 September 2007 (UTC)
- Cull Tremayne 02:04, 1 October 2007 (UTC)
- Go, Chack. Is it indeed your birthday? Graestan (This party's over) 02:32, 8 October 2007 (UTC)
Oppose
Conflicting sources should be sorted out. Jediknight19bby (Jedi High Council Chambers!) 19:58, 10 August 2007 (UTC)The article says "Fighting broke out all over Pau City between droid and clone forces, destroying large parts of the sinkhole," and cites Revenge of the Sith. But I didn't see the sinkhole itself sustaining any damage when I saw the film. -LtNOWIS 01:56, 12 August 2007 (UTC)Also, I don't think there should be quite so many inter-section quotes, especially in "Endgame."-LtNOWIS 01:56, 12 August 2007 (UTC)- Fixed. Chack Jadson Talk 23:01, 12 August 2007 (UTC)
- From the desk of Atarumaster88
Needs a reference at the end of "In the service of San Hill"Needs a reference at the end of "The beginning of the war"A bit more information from Labyrinth of Evil is needed.- IIRC, LOE has details on Belderone, etc, particularly when he rescues Gunray. I'd like to see that expounded upon. Some guy 15:24, 21 August 2007 (UTC)
- Ah. Sorry, some guy. ;) Chack Jadson Talk 22:42, 21 August 2007 (UTC)
Some sticky wording in the death section, particularly in "However, during the fight, Kenobi had pulled one of Grievous's chest plates off, Grievous's armor having been previously damaged by Windu, revealing the synth-skin gutsack holding Grievous's remaining organs"<s?- P&T has no mention of his "softer" (okay, maybe just less bloodthirsty) side with Kunmar.
- First lines of talents needs ref'd.
(Talents) "Formal forms"? Reword please.- Have a Super Terrific Friendly Unfrustrating day. Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 14:32, 16 August 2007 (UTC)
- Fixed. Chack Jadson Talk 20:09, 20 August 2007 (UTC)
I'd like to see a solid source for the Gary Oldman thing. Also, you might want to mention George's plans for effing with Grivie's history in the upcoming cartoon. -- Ozzel 03:29, 20 August 2007 (UTC)- Sourced the first. For the second, where did you find that? Chack Jadson Talk 21:38, 23 August 2007 (UTC)
I may be wrong, but I would think that the content from the Grievous comic would need a bit more fleshing out than just a passing mention. Thefourdotelipsis 23:37, 28 August 2007 (UTC)Actually, the coverage of things such as the Clone Wars Adventures books are far too light. And sometimes non existent. Thefourdotelipsis 23:39, 28 August 2007 (UTC)
Far too many images (Criteria 15).--Imperialles 19:45, 30 August 2007 (UTC)Unsourced entries in the trivia section. Come to think of it, we should probably either get rid of the trivia section entirely, or merge the interesting parts with other sections.--Imperialles 14:18, 1 September 2007 (UTC)- No, I think the trivia section should be kept. It'll be interesting information for some people. Unit 8311 16:57, 1 September 2007 (UTC)
- Oh, God, didn't see that before. Get rid of the Trivia section, for God's sake. Any information that is really relevant will be important enough to be integrated into other sections. Thefourdotelipsis 13:15, 2 September 2007 (UTC)
- No, I think the trivia section should be kept. It'll be interesting information for some people. Unit 8311 16:57, 1 September 2007 (UTC)
- Just a couple of minor things:
Yes, get rid of the trivia section, per 4dot's argument. Greyman(Paratus) 15:45, 2 September 2007 (UTC)Please source the following information in the infobox: Homeworld, death, eye color, and cybernetics. I would also like to see his species sourced since it is not blatantly obvious like some characters.The intro could stand to be expanded by a couple sentences; major events, etc. His death should also be mentioned at the end of the intro.- Looks/reads good otherwise :) Greyman(Paratus) 01:10, 5 September 2007 (UTC)
Needs info from Dark Jedi--Eyrezer 12:39, 3 September 2007 (UTC)Interwiki links are woefully inadequate. -LtNOWIS 06:49, 8 September 2007 (UTC)- Fixed. -LtNOWIS 21:23, 10 September 2007 (UTC)
I'd like to see the introduction rewritten to remove POV ("fearsome") and poor prose ("He earned the rank of Supreme Commander, and as the commander,").--Imperialles 14:19, 12 September 2007 (UTC)- Fixed. Chack Jadson Talk 19:59, 12 September 2007 (UTC)
Unsourced image: File:30th Lo General GrievousPreCyborg.jpg -- dmirableAckbar (It's A Trap!) 19:56, 15 September 2007 (UTC)- Fixed. Chack Jadson Talk 22:56, 16 September 2007 (UTC)
- Few things:
I'd like to see BTS info on the publicity for Grievous; where he was first revealed, how he was first just known as "the new bad guy", etc.Also, BTS statements need sourcing. Some have sourcing in the text, so not those, but stuff like the entire first paragraph, the cough, and the information on the upcoming series.- Lord Hydronium 10:30, 16 September 2007 (UTC)
Per Hydronium- sourcing needed. Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 13:35, 19 September 2007 (UTC)- Fixed it up. Review it and let me know what you think. Sorry it took me so long. Chack Jadson Talk 01:29, 21 September 2007 (UTC)
- From the lair of Hobbes15
No mention of the attack of Coruscant in intro? A little bit should be added, at least.Ref affiliation section of infobox.3 redlinks- kind of edges the limit, although this isn't a full-fledged objection.- Still two; however, not enough to object.Hobbes15(Tiger Headquarters) 22:41, 20 September 2007 (UTC)
In the last paragraph of Victorious on all Fronts, clarify the sequence of events. Grievous didn't know Gunray's mechnochair had been responsible for the leak of info until after the battle; however, he was suspicious of Gunray, and confronted him, which is the reason Gunray admitted losing the mechnochair. Because of this, Grievous didn't suspect anything was amiss when he led the assault on Belderone."Palpatine had been taken to a secret bunker aboard a maglev train;. Grievous and his MagnaGuards dueled the Jedi Mace Windu and Kit Fisto on top of the train." Reword this somehow so it makes sense.Tis all from me. Interesting read. Hobbes15(Tiger Headquarters) 03:56, 20 September 2007 (UTC)- Sorted that. Unit 8311 17:08, 20 September 2007 (UTC)
- Thanks. Hobbes15(Tiger Headquarters) 22:41, 20 September 2007 (UTC)
- Thanks for the help 8311. Chack Jadson Talk 01:29, 21 September 2007 (UTC)
- Thanks. Hobbes15(Tiger Headquarters) 22:41, 20 September 2007 (UTC)
- Sorted that. Unit 8311 17:08, 20 September 2007 (UTC)
Source File:Grievoussabers.jpg and licensing for File:30th Lo General GrievousPreCyborg.jpg. Green Tentacle (Talk) 22:49, 1 October 2007 (UTC)- Couple of things from glancing at it (I will read it properly eventually):
The fall of Martyr, first paragraph needs a source.- Transformation: Source "He treated Grievous like a typical mindless droid even after being told that was not the case."
- The beginning of the war: Source "Dooku, impressed with the general's performance at Geonosis, trained Grievous in the art of lightsaber combat, which Grievous took to at a rapid pace."
- The general revealed: Source "Soon the entire Republic would tremble before Grievous's brutality and strategic prowess..."
- Talents and abilities: Source lightsabers of people he didn't kill.
- The beginning of the war, second paragraph: Redundant ref if it's all from one source.
Battle tactics and strategies, first paragraph: Redundant ref if the first two are the same source. Green Tentacle (Talk) 19:49, 7 October 2007 (UTC)- Sorted the third one. Unit 8311 18:21, 9 October 2007 (UTC)
- Indeed you did, but please don't strike another user's objections. I'd also like to add that reference 4 has no name. Green Tentacle (Talk) 18:36, 9 October 2007 (UTC)
- Sorted the third one. Unit 8311 18:21, 9 October 2007 (UTC)
The last paragraph of the "Contradictions" section appears to be pure original research. Remove it.--Imperialles 13:42, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
Comments
Approved by Inquisitorius 13:50, 21 October 2007 (UTC)
- Well written overall and a pleasure to read. Atarumaster88 (Talk page) 14:32, 16 August 2007 (UTC)
- Objections are fixed. Just needs a few Inq votes. Chack Jadson (Talk) 22:52, 29 September 2007 (UTC)