- The following discussion is preserved as an archive of a Good article nomination that was successful. Please do not modify it.
Contents
Atrocity on Mahranee[]
- Nominated by: Manoof (talk) 13:19, 23 August 2021 (UTC)
- Nomination comments: Former GA, previous issue was fixed but status not updated. Fixed a Cite_web and edits since status was removed are appropriate so it should be good to go. Had a look over and didn't notice anything.
- WookieeProject (optional):
(3 ACs/2 Users/5 Total)
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Support[]
- UberSoldat93 (talk) 12:37, 29 August 2021 (UTC)
- OOM 224 14:38, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
- Fan26 (Talk) 21:40, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
- Editoronthewiki (talk) 19:00, 15 September 2021 (UTC)
- MasterFred(talk) 11:24, 10 October 2021 (UTC)
Object[]
UberSoldat[]
In the date note, I'd like you to specify the sources the events are from when first introducing those events in the note.Per precedent, the BTS doesn't need an extra ref explaining what Dark Disciple originally was.UberSoldat93 (talk) 07:42, 28 August 2021 (UTC)- Ok Removed the second line as not required. Need to dig for the first point. Manoof (talk) 11:25, 29 August 2021 (UTC)
- You need to reintroduce that info. This event could have been featured in the original story arc. UberSoldat93 (talk) 11:47, 29 August 2021 (UTC)
- Ok Removed the second line as not required. Need to dig for the first point. Manoof (talk) 11:25, 29 August 2021 (UTC)
Per what we discussed on Discord, these sources should be investigated for mentions. Any new alternate names should be documented in the intro and the BTS.UberSoldat93 (talk) 09:10, 3 September 2021 (UTC)- Sources checked, massive thanks to User:Ayrehead02, User:CT-1742, User:Lewisr, User:LucaRoR and User:Immi_Thrax for sorting through them as well! Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 08:25, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
Editor[]
The book notes, reffering to Dooku's voice, "Oh, she knew that voice. The Mahran had heard it uttering all sorts of pretty lies and promises that were never intended to be kept." So Dooku attempted some kind of dimplomatic approach. So that needs to be notedEditoronthewiki (talk) 16:21, 4 September 2021 (UTC)- "Count Dooku, the leader of the Confederacy, had unsuccessfully attempted to win the planet over using false promises and lies before planning an assault to take the planet's resources by force.". I also moved the context of Dooku being the Confederacy leader here as well as it should've been earlier in the piece to start with. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 05:49, 5 September 2021 (UTC)
Events in the concurrent section of the infobox need proper date notes. The Mando civil war would use the Star Wars: The Clone Wars Chronological Episode Order link used in 19 BBY date, the Mygeeto campaign note just needs to describe how it starting in 21 BBY and not ending until the end of the war means its concurrent.Editoronthewiki (talk) 21:06, 5 September 2021 (UTC)
Fan[]
Plo Koon's quote in the prelude doesn't really feel relevant to the attack.- It's relevance is in establishing the timeline for the attack in the context of wider clone wars. It happens at the beginning of the book so there's not much there that I can see from google books. I did expand it to give it a bit more direct context. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 08:25, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
"Though they failed to execute Dooku,[5] it was not until the Battle of Coruscant that Skywalker finally managed to kill him" The usage of "...it was not until..." feels really weird here, as if failing to kill Dooku somehow set the stage for Skywalker to kill the Count himself and it was strange for it to take until Coruscant. I think this sentence should be reworded.Fan26 (Talk) 21:41, 11 September 2021 (UTC)
OOM[]
There are some missing links here, especially in the reference notesIntro could use a paragraph breakPlease fix the Quote formatting for the Prelude sectionOOM 224 08:32, 12 September 2021 (UTC)Also, please see my edit here and revise the date ref for the Mygeeto Campaign; one major issue there is that it mentions the attack on Mahranee but doesn't cite it to any sourceOOM 224 08:41, 12 September 2021 (UTC)"19 BBY, the final year of the Clone War" isn't supported by the cited ref note. Since there's no need to mention that 19 BBY was the final year of the war, I would just reword it as "In 19 BBY, during the Clone Wars"OOM 224 11:36, 12 September 2021 (UTC)"leading to the Mahran refugee craft being caught in the middle" — Is this referring to Chubor's frigate? The article doesn't make it clear- I've rewritten this to be more in-line with the book. It's not clear that the Marhan ships were caught in the middle, only that they were attempting to flee. Chubor's frigate was a republic vessel per the prior sentence so the combination should make this clear. Manoof (he/him/his) (talk) 12:39, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
Finally, "who could assist in getting close to the elusive Sith Lord […] convinced her to take him on as a partner" — I believe this entire section is irrelevant to the subject at hand. The rest of the paragraph is enough for the purposes of this article.OOM 224 11:53, 12 September 2021 (UTC)
Comments[]
Approved as a Good article by AgriCorps 11:24, 10 October 2021 (UTC)