Remember those feel-good movie characters from the aughts who'd one day find a troubled family and teach them how to love again? Well, none of them were available, so I'll have to do.

That's right, I've gathered some of the wildest family drama from across Reddit, and now you're invited to my virtual BBQ to hear it all. From failed family vacations to parents knowing when to cut the leash, I'm still here to ruin everyone's Thanksgiving, even if we're in July.

I May Have Destroyed My Niece's Innocence To Spite My Sister

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So, unfortunately for me (30F), my initials are DP (first and middle name). And for those who don't know, it's also the abbreviation for double penetration. Throughout the end of middle school and all of high school, it was an easy target for bullying. Amongst other things, this one always annoyed me. Of course, my sister (32F) knows it annoys me. Always has. She thinks it's hilarious. She lives about an hour away from me, so we only manage to see each other like once or twice a month. My sister has a daughter (10F) whom I love dearly, but she can be a little shit. Every once in a while, my sister likes to mess with me and will throw around "Aunt DP," e.g., "Go ask Aunt DP," "Call her Aunt DP, she hates it." Yesterday, she came over with my niece to spend some time with me and my kid. We started bickering because she never picks up after herself. Minor sister shit. Our kids are in the same room, so she looks at her daughter and says, "Ask Aunt DP if she's mad, bro." My niece doesn't skip a beat, "Aunt DP, why you mad bro?" I look my sister dead in her eyes and said, "Next time she calls me Aunt DP around the kids, or has her kid say it, I'm telling her what it REALLY means." Again, without skipping a beat, my niece says, "Wait... what do you mean? What does it REALLY mean? I thought it was just your name," and asked a few more times, but I just told her to drop it. They left, and I THOUGHT it blew over. But I know how 10-year-olds are. My sister just texted me, saying her daughter has non-stop been asking, "What does DP mean?" and that I was an asshole for saying that in front of her. She says she's afraid she's going to ask her friends and said I should have let her think it was just my initials and that it'll "ruin her innocence." I told her that's her problem, and she should have stopped calling me that shit years ago when we graduated high school. So, am I the asshole for saying I'd tell her? And would I be the asshole if I did? Cause I swear I'm one more "Aunt DP" away from telling her. Edit for clarity: She didn't give me the nickname. Kids in middle school did. But she always thought it was hilarious.

Your sister really opened up a can of worms that got all over her mouth, ears and nose. It's karma, a dirty joke that has now piqued the curiosity of her pre-teen. Nobody's cheering on and actually wants that kid to hear the truth, and your sister should have thought twice before involving her. It's only a matter of time before somebody, or Google, tells her what that nickname also means. I do hope you patch things up with your sister. Read the rest of the thread here.

My Sister Doesn't Want My Partner To Attend Her Wedding, Despite All My Free Help

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My (28M) sister (32F) is getting married in a couple of months. My partner (30M) and I have been together for four years, and we're very serious. He's been nothing but kind to my family, even though they're conservative and sometimes vocal about their thoughts on our relationship. A few weeks ago, my sister sent out her wedding invitations. I was shocked to see that my partner wasn't invited. When I asked her why, she said she didn't think it was necessary to invite him because "we're not married yet" and she wanted to keep the guest list small. However, I've noticed that she invited several plus-ones of our other relatives and friends who aren't married either. For some context, my family is Catholic and very religious. When I came out as gay in my early teens, it split the family. It has taken a long time for everyone to move past their differences, but in the last five or so years things have started to feel somewhat normal again. Despite this, my sister still makes subtle remarks about disagreeing with my sexuality sometimes, which makes me think there might be another reason behind her decision. To further complicate things, I'm a wedding planner and have been helping my sister with planning free of charge. We were really close as kids, and that kind of fell apart when I came out, so I was excited about the opportunity to do something for her and to be involved in her special day. I tried to talk to her and explain how hurtful not inviting my partner was and how it felt like she was intentionally excluding him. She brushed me off and said it was her wedding and she could invite whoever she wanted. I told her that if she couldn't respect my relationship, I wouldn't be able to support her on her big day. This includes helping her with wedding preparations, which I've been heavily involved in up to this point. Additionally, several of the vendors she's working with are close friends of mine, and they have expressed their discomfort with the situation. She may lose some of them as a result, and will likely have to hire another wedding planner, which will significantly increase her costs. Now my family is furious with me. My parents are saying that I'm overreacting and that I should just suck it up for the sake of family harmony. They think I'm being petty and selfish for backing out of helping my sister just because my partner wasn't invited. My sister, of course, is playing the victim and saying that I'm ruining her wedding. I feel strongly about standing up for my partner and our relationship, but the backlash from my family is making me second-guess myself. AITA for refusing to help my sister with her wedding because she didn't invite my partner?

Your sister, a full-grown adult, needs to learn that nobody can have their cake and eat it too, brides included. I say the only middle ground here is to offer your services for the appropriate price. If she's not going to treat you like family, why is she getting a special family discount? Yes, she can always change her mind, and we all hope she does, but not at the cost of your time and sanity. This also doesn't seem like it'll end here. If it's a no at the wedding, what hope is there you that you two will ever get another invite? Stand your ground and let everybody know you're not that same kid they used to push around. Read the rest of the thread here.

Does This Wedding Dress Mess Point Towards A Doomed Marriage?

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I (27F) met my fiancé Jacob (31M) when I was 21. We've been together for six years and engaged for almost a year out of those. My mother's wedding dress has been passed down for generations, and I remember being a little girl dreaming of walking down the aisle in it. We have recently been wedding planning and were invited to a dinner hosted by my fiancé's family that was on Sunday. When we arrived, we greeted everyone and sat at the table to eat. SIL stood up and tapped her spoon against her glass and said that she had to make a toast. She then said she would be right back before going into another room and returning with a large plastic bag. Everyone seemed to be excited, but I just felt confused. I awkwardly smiled as I asked SIL what was inside the bag. She opened it up to reveal her wedding dress from her wedding, which was two years ago. Everyone began clapping as SIL announced that this was her official wedding gift to us and she wanted me to wear her dress at the wedding. I tried to smile, but I guess I didn't do a good job of hiding my disappointment, and everyone began asking me what was wrong. I tried to explain how I wanted to wear my mother's dress and that it was nothing personal, but that I refused to wear my SIL's dress. My SIL began crying as my in-laws began tearing into me and comforting her. I just burst into tears and ran outside. My fiancé didn't even come after me, and after crying my eyes out on the steps for what felt like hours, he finally came outside and yelled at me to get into the car. I was so confused, but I got into the car just to hear him berate me on how I had made such a big scene and embarrassed him in front of his family. He sounded so mad and he even said he couldn't believe he chose to marry such a "bitchy cunt" (his exact words). My fiancé also said how SIL was just trying to be nice and that her dress was more modern compared to my mother's dress, which looked like an "old rag" (also his exact words). I tried to tell him how much my mother's wedding dress meant to me because I promised her that I would wear it. I felt like my fiancé's family planned this and put me on the spot thinking I wouldn't stand up for myself and just agree to wear SIL's dress. I don't think I did anything wrong, but a part of me thinks I should have just gone along with it and then told SIL in private that I wouldn't be wearing the dress. AITA?

Jordan Peel could make a whole movie out of that family, get out while you can. My goodness, it sounds like everyone literally hates you, including your fiancé. Nope, we got to take a sharp left turn, exit and realize our early-twenties are for making mistakes, but not something this colossal. Nobody in the comments, including myself,sees this ending well. You can argue with your partner, sure, but there was no need to get the claws out like he did. I hope you find somebody one day who won't look at your family heritage as a "rag." Please know you deserve better. Read the rest of the thread here.

Check out last week's edition here.

[Image credit: olia danilevich]